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It’s been easy
to get into a holiday mood here in the Midwest this year. We had
several inches of snow even before Thanksgiving and we’ve had three
good snowfalls since. And last night, I had a holiday dream ....
Before I fell
asleep, I had a feeling of foreboding...a chill that might have had
something to do with the shakiness of the economy, or maybe the fact
that I have so much holiday shopping to do. But I did eventually
fall into the dream world.
Sometime in the
middle of the night, my dreams were interrupted by an insistent
“spirit” who demanded my presence at a movie show of my past. I saw
myself as a child filled with anticipation of the Big Day—creating
gifts, decorations, and cards. I was reminded that as I got older, I
baked and decorated cookies, came up with creative ways to wrap
gifts, and volunteered in the community. In my early adulthood, I
grew to love the quiet darkness that settles in moments between all
the hurrying and relentless activity of the holiday season.
Just as I was
falling into a deeper sleep, I was jolted by the appearance of a
second “spirit” who pulled me into—well, have you ever had an
experience that you know was a dream (because you woke up), but it
felt so real while it was happening? I found myself at a business
meeting that seemed to be happening right around Christmas this
year. People were having a good time, this being the last meeting
before the holiday. I, however, was anxious about things I had to
do, vague fears about the coming year, and uncertainty about how the
economic situation would affect my plans. Then my guide whisked me
forward to the day before Christmas Eve and suddenly I was rushing
from store to store, my hands clutching crumpled lists and unwieldy
shopping bags. Thoughts flashing: “Not enough! Not enough!” “Never
enough!”
Then...just
like that...it was over. Peace. Calm.
For about 30
seconds.
I felt the
presence of a third visitor, a shadowy, dark figure compelling me to
follow. I was a little afraid, but felt myself moving, unable to
stop myself. I somehow knew that we were moving into the future. I
saw myself at Christmas time 2010. I looked tired—no—exhausted,
while the holiday world spun around me. The spirit let me know
without saying a word that I was in danger of being crushed by
fear—fear of scarcity, fear of not having enough, fear of not being
enough. Then it widened the view to show the many opportunities
flowing around me that I wasn’t seeing in my diminished state. I
asked the silent shadow if the future I saw before me was fixed and
unchangeable or if it could be influenced by changes I might make in
my present life. No answer.
The next thing
I was aware of was a bright light. It pulled me through the fog of
the dream world into waking consciousness. I realized it was the
sun. I was actually awake! Wow...what a dream...what a series of
dreams!
I ran to my
computer, pulled up Google, and looked for the new
Google-countdown-gadget I had placed on my homepage to tell me how
many days until Christmas. 15! I still had 15 days left! Then I
pulled out a yellow pad and a pen. As inspiration came, I made my
new holiday list. This is what I read when the list was done:
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I will live
every single moment of every single day.
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I will do
today’s work fully and completely.
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I will allow
the past and the future to inform and inspire me, but I will live
in the present.
-
I will be
grateful for everything that I have and every opportunity that
opens to me.
-
I will open
my heart to the other souls that share my moments and my life.
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When I feel
inspired, I will create, for the sheer joy of creating.
I wish you the
very brightest of holidays.
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